Affirmations for the new Moon in Leo, in the natal 12th House. Or how to move past total burn-out.

New Moon in Leo today, which falls in my Leonine 12th House. How do I feel? Absolutely exhausted.

Normally, when the Sun is basking in the flamboyant sign it loves best, self-expression and creativity are favoured, as we press on into the fiery heart of the last month of summer.

And I'd have loved to have taken up creative pursuits again - in another life (so it seems), I played music, sang, wrote poetry, short stories, scripts, acted, danced, directed...

But having spent the past five months using every waking minute focusing on learning how to make money through the internet, my brain and personal stamina are flagging. I'm burned out.

It would make sense to take a break from all the finance-oriented stuff, the technical tutorials on 'how to set up this' or 'how to configure that' or 'where to download the other' and the endless ebooks that detail the myriad business plans to a viable money-making endeavour online.

It would make sense simply to surrender (12H) and renew my loyalty (Leo) to my longterm goal of being a working writer-director - a mover and shaker in the performing arts (Leo).

It would make sense to revisit my half-finished feature scripts, rewrite my short screenplays, review the plan for the kids' book I'd intended to write... or even just play my guitar and read for pleasure. Especially with Mercury about to retrograde on August 20.

But I can't.

As transiting Saturn grimly ploughs on through my Second House, inching towards conjoining my natal Pluto in October...

...thereafter to oppose my natal Venus and square my birth Saturn (while transiting Pluto moves closer to squaring its position at my birth)...

...the relentlessness (Pluto-Saturn) of the need to turn around my income and moneymaking ability (Second House) - and with it, transform (Pluto) my self-worth (Second House) by building a solid foundation (Saturn) for my finances - is endless.

And I have to honour that drive, no matter how much unease and anxiety it creates in me to put aside working on my true 'craft'.

So, on this new Moon in Leo:

I give thanks for the pride I will take in the creativity that waits to be tapped into, at the right time.

I give thanks for the professional accomplishments and kudos that hopefully are to come.

And I give thanks for the source of the storytelling that comes from beyond me, and which will flow through me once again... just as soon as I've dealt with these Second House issues of generating income.

(And self-worth).




The image above was taken from this site.

What's a ninth guy like you doing...?

Greetings all.

I've been gone from this blog a long time. A long time. And for those who were interested readers, I apologise both for the hiatus and for disappointing you in terms of keeping up. Much has happened in the interim, and this is an attempt to zippily catch you up on what's going on in my life right now.

For one thing, I survived June, July and August 2009 in Cyprus.

While I love the intensity of the heat of summer on this island - it's pretty trippy walking down the street most times, it's THAT hot - I find the quiet, slow pace of life and the dearth of people (Nicosia, the capital where I live, becomes a ghost town in summer) very difficult to manage at times.

I suppose this is mostly because the intense heat, sluggish pace of life and reduced human contact turn me inward, when my natural inclination is to be on the go all the time and avoid those dark places in my mind, heart, soul.

However, the summer, for this very reason, is an optimal time for me to strip everything down to its bare bones, eat lightly and do lots of exercise and meditation. Which is precisely what I did.

The pain at my failed relationship is still with me. I've had spells when I haven't thought of the ex at all. Other times - such as this past October, when I returned to Cyprus after attending a short film festival in Tangier - I was overwhelmed with how much I missed her. Not to mention, last Friday, the ex before the current ex had her first baby. You'd have thought that her having been married for four years would have been enough for me to have moved on, but I guess some ties are very hard to sever.

Anyhoo, when I haven't been working on moving on from the detritus of my former romantic life, I have been learning and practising new spiritual techniques and forms of meditation, writing a screenplay for a new short and accepting clients for astrological readings.

Suffice it to say, I'm going to be posting much more regularly, recommitting to and re-investing in this blog, because I have a need to write and express myself very badly. I have a need to make contact with people and to unburden my mind and heart.

Consequently, there may be less polish, but I hope you'll bear with me, since writing to me has become much more important than cranking out the perfect post.

Oh yes, and in the meantime, I've stumbled on a new system of illumination - Human Design - which I think is amazing. You can google it for more information, but I'll be posting on that, as well as about my ongoing adventures in art, metaphysics and day-to-day human-ness (hopefully in the spirit of humane-ness, too).

On a completely unrelated note, how are we enjoying the transiting Saturn-Pluto square so far?

Saturn's currently in my second house (where natal Pluto in Libra lurks) and Pluto's in my Capricorn fifth. Selfworth-boosting income (Saturn in the second) that I can then focusedly plug into my filmmaking (Pluto in the fifth) is definitely proving a toughie to pull. Even more challenging with this particular transit, is moving beyond the fear/angst in trying to earn a decent income before daring to think about romance again.

So there you have it for the time being. More to come soon!

Jack Nicholson, Taurus Par Excellence

Jack Nicholson is much on my mind these days, given how this Taurean native is the epitome of the unhurried, earthy, macho type who won't surrender his pleasures, even when the price to be paid is higher than he can afford.

Allow me to explain.

Since my breakup with my ex (see my earlier post on this here), I've been focused on pouring myself into my filmmaking career. Indeed, the better part of the past six months I spent in New York (a city I intend to make my home some day) was spent re-connecting with my fellow film alums from Columbia University's graduate film programme.

My aim is to write a feature script - a film noir - set in Cyprus, to launch my career as a writer/director. I figure the island of my birth might just be the happy hunting ground I need for a first full-length film, and hopefully the relatively good impression which was left by the short I wrote and directed last year will help things happen for me.

Given my interest in the noir form, I keep coming back to two films for inspiration: Chinatown and The Crying Game, though of course, neither film is a true example of the genre. However, Chinatown has been particularly informative, not only for its dazzling direction and glamorous production design, but the charismatic performances by Faye Dunaway and, in particular, Taurean man's man, Jack Nicholson.

All things considered, thoughts of his performance are quite fitting given the sun is now in Taurus, and I wonder whether I'll end up modelling my story's anti-hero on Nicholson, or on Scorpio sun (and zodiacal opposite to Taurus) Stephen Rea, who is the protagonist of The Crying Game.

Fascinating actors both. Tough, tough choice. Stay tuned.






This still from Chinatown was taking from this site.