Saturday, August 2, 2008

Another Slap in the 2012 Survivalists' Faces

These days, I'm lucky if I get to this blog once a month. But once again, I couldn't resist posting on a rather wry, witty riposte (actually, more like an annihilation) of the 2012 survivalists' frenzy of preparation for doomsday.

Naturally, part of why I enjoyed Eliezer Sobel's post was the unflattering dosage of vigorous schadenfreude. But then again, we do do that anyway on this blog. Just check out the banner if you don't believe me!

Mostly, though, part of me is now so invested in making more out of my life than merely living till 2012. Some of the dreams are grand, some of them are humble.

I have films to make, financial independence to seek and a family to provide for. Not to mention, greater spiritual and physical mastery to strive for (is that a holographic Zen Buddhist monk I see before me, frowning? "Strive not! Neither resist striving!"). And humility and a greater ability to serve to cultivate...

But back to the Sobel's post on 2012. Here are the opening paras, as ever:

"Don't ask me to cite the source, but I recall Terence McKenna once suggesting that the Mayan calendar calculations might possibly have been off by two thousand years, in which case it is the year 4012 for which we need to be gearing up, not 2012. That gives us a little breathing room to finish wrapping up our affairs and stockpiling Basmati rice, peanut-butter cookies and Power Bars, and if you have a generator, the complete set of Seinfeld DVDs to help pass the time on those long, apocalyptic nights. And lately survivalists are also recommending stashing huge quantities of Benadryl in order to deal with all the new allergic reactions that the end of the world is likely to precipitate. Clearly the last thing you want to be dealing with when reality as we know it comes crashing down is a runny nose.

"Meanwhile, there are many people who remain unaware that we may be getting this 2000-year grace period and thus may have quite a shock in store on Dec 22, 2012, the day after it is all supposed to come tumbling down. There's nothing worse than business as usual when you're expecting the end of the world. Can you imagine the sinking feeling some people will experience on that morning when it slowly begins to dawn on them that rather than toppling headlong into a worldwide collective existential abyss, they instead have to show up for work? It will be reminiscent of those early childhood days of waking to a beautiful, silent, freshly fallen snow, the heart leaping in a Christmas-morning-like rush of freedom and possibility, only to learn that the three-inch sprinkling of powder was insufficient to shut down the local schools.

"And just when you thought you'd be off the hook from all your financial obligations for the fourth fiscal quarter of 2012, instead you end up incurring a bunch of late fees because you had been hoping to slip into the End Times with a few unpaid bills. Rather than hearing the voices of angels guiding our souls to the next station on our way to oblivion, instead the phone is ringing off the hook with creditors who won't take no-or Armageddon-for an answer."

And you can read the rest here. Enjoy!