The second time my ex and I broke up was this New Year's day. That's right, before the current permanent parting, we'd had two earlier dress rehearsals.
To elaborate: on January 1st of this year, we decided to split up again and I fell into such a funk I hopped over to Llewellyn's Web Tarot and did a free online spread based on my relationship woes - mostly to see if there was a shred of hope to be had.
Not a chance.
The spread was a Celtic Cross (the only one I really have some knowledge of - I'm no Tarot expert) and the outcome was the eight of cups. Which, in the mythic tarot deck I generally use, signifies mourning, and a descent into the underworld as the consequence of a relationship-associated death.
We later decided to hang on in there to give things one last shot, so I thought the cards to have been mistaken.
I was wrong.
Mourning is a very important part of the grieving (and healing) process I'm told. Experientially, it feels awful - especially if, as the grief gurus recommend - we don't fight or distract ourselves from feeling our pain, but rather embrace it.
That's why, from what I gather, observant Jews 'sit shiva' after a death, whereby those who are bereaved are required to do nothing but sit and encounter their grief again and again and again for a specified period. To really enter the underworld of mourning.
And then, at the end of that specified time, they are to resume the normal course of their lives. Which all sounds eminently sensible to me and is probably one of the healthiest ways to gain closure.
But whichever way you tackle it, it's still painful as hell.
The image above was taken from this site.
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